Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[Felsmak]

Granted, but now you become the genie and have to grant my wish!

I wish for the ability to summon the Kraken whenever I feel annoyed with whatever.

[ShachonianX]

Granted, but it destroys the world.

I wish I could have a robot army.

[Felsmak]

Granted, but they don't obey you.

I wish I could speak German fluently.

[Flixxbeatz]

Granted. Now you only know German and forget all the languages you've learned before.

I wish for skills.

[POTKC]

Granted. You are now excellent at farting.

I wish I could go to Kerbin.

[eatorsp]

Granted. As soon as you land, an empty SRB hits your head (SPLAT!)

I wish for a time machine

Edited May 7, 2013 by eatorsp

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but you are sued by the Doctor for copyright infringement.

I wish that I could fight the final boss of the internet.

[satcharna]

Granted. It's me. I defeat you.

Congratulations on losing, sucker.

I wish there were more good and moderately realistic sci-fi books.

[SpaceK531]

Granted. Now they are all picture books like the Magic Schoolbus.

I wish that lunch would last forever.

[Jarod645]

Granted, but you get fat and bloated from eating so much lunch.

I wish I could take a trip to space aboard Virgin Galactic's Spaceshiptwo.

[Flixxbeatz]

Granted. You're now aboard, but it explodes mid-air, killing everyone.

I wish for a nerve gear.

[Felsmak]

Granted. Your spinal cord now has a gear in it.

I wish DeviantART had an anime filter. Sailor Moon was created for the sole purpose of trolling space geeks.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, it now filters out anything BUT anime.

I wish that the SCP Foundation was real.

[Rockcoole]

Granted. Good luck getting out. I have let loss all the SCP's.

I wish I could dance like this guy.

[ShachonianX]

Granted, but your legs break while doing the dance.

I wish I could be the ruler of the internet.

[satcharna]

Granted. Unfortunately, the internet gets replaced by the Extranet after a while.

I wish they'd release the new expansion for Civ V a bit quicker. I am tired of waiting.

[ShachonianX]

Granted, but the game is buggy beyond belief.

I wish I could be more popular on YouTube.

[(An Original Name)]

Granted, but all the other famous youtubers conspire to eliminate you.

I wish that everything was free.

[Dynamo]

Granted, but there's nothing left for you by the time you arrive to loot stores.

I wish i could calculate Delta-V in my head for my Interplanetary craft.

[SpaceK531]

granted, but now you can't stop thinking about your kerbals and the delta-v and oh god, english? delta-v delta-v delta-v!

I wish that my Pokemon Green didn't run out of batteries.

[MmPMSFmM]

Granted, Pokemon Green has removed all of it's save data and changed to Pokemon Blue.

I wish I had a way to enlarge a grain of sand so I can make bricks out of them.

[Flixxbeatz]

Granted. You are now shrunk to a size that you would be able to hold a grain of sand like a stone.

I wish the Moon has the same gravity as Tylo.

[LaydeeDem]

Granted. The higher tide covers most of the continents and a lot of people die.

I wish the Doctor Who episode "Love and Monsters" was never written.

[chobit-389]

NOT granted, quit your whining ;P

I wish for 999 limited edition Toblerones!

[POTKC]

Granted. However, termites invaded the Toblerone factory, and a lot of them fell into the chocolate mixing facility. You can guess what happened to the limited edition Toblerones.

I wish we could actually choose what crew we have on our KSP flights.