Kerbalsaurus

Never met him. @TwoCalories

Picked up Cities: Skylines again, this time with a vision. I've started on buidling a German city, called Nordseewiese, set in the fictional state of Verwirrung, on the Verstehen River. SO far it's only at ~8,000 residents, but for the area of the city that's actually really dense. These are all pictures of the historic district, called Altstadt.

Sir Deddly was reading an audiobook loudly when, suddenly, an enormous knocking

8/10 Fellow artist

Why do you keep commenting on these ancient reports?

These are both really good suggestions, but @dsplaisted’s is the best.

I might have mentioned this before, but Kerbals could be semi-autotrophic, like the Emerald Green Sea Slug. They could have special pouches in their intestines that catch chloroplasts, and distribute them to their skin, where is behaves like melanin, turning their skin green and plant like. Maybe we’ve been looking at this wrong too. Maybe they aren’t plants or animals, but rather multicellular protists. This would give them similar qualities to both kingdoms.

Milwookie goes to a Brewers game. William Cookieras

I've been thinking about changing Kerbalsaurus Kerman's name. It's kind of an obnoxious Mary Sue. Any suggestions? My only idea is to call him "The Director".

I’m probably going to make the next update more of a story based one, but I just want to check, do you guys actually like those? Should I keep doing these more personal behind the scenes type things, or should I just stick with the missions?

That is the mod Kerbin Side Remastered. It adds accessories to KSC runway, and adds many more airports and (I think) improves the Making History launchsites. It's a cool mod, I'd use it. Also, thanks for catching that typo! I guess I didn't fully delete that sentence.

~KERBAL GAZETTE~ KERBALS FLY HIGHER THAN EVER BEFORE YEAR 1, DAY 97 - CS/X-5 CHEETA TEST FLIGHT MISSION OBJECTIVE: Fly the Cheeta to a 20km altitude LAUNCH VEHICLE: CS/X-5 Cheeta CREW: PILOT: Valentina Kerman NAVIGATOR: Bob Kerman Valentina mumbles something about the photographer to Bob Kerbals once again scream down the runway at Cape Kerman, alongside their jets. The purpose of today's flight was to try and bring the jet as high as it could possibly go, although the goal set was 20km minimum. Last flight, Jebediah complained that the plane was quite difficult to control, especially the closer he was to sea level. “This is a plane I’m extremely excited to fly,” Valentina said. “It’s sleek, it’s fast, it’s cool, and I can’t wait to get behind another CalSpace plane. I’ve flown a few of them, crashed a few of them. They have a whole insurance policy dedicated to me! Plus, I’ll fly higher than ANY Kerbal has. Suck it, Jeb!” Bob on the other hand, was less excited about the flight. We tried to ask him for his opinion, but all he could muster were some small whimpers. It was a bit of a rough takeoff, as the plane experienced the same issues of sliding around on the runway, just like last time. Also noticeable on the plane are the large modifications made to the fuselage. In an attempt to shed excess mass, the drop tank and front elevons were removed. Also, in order to correct the center of mass closer to, well, the center, lots of fuel was drained from the back fuel tanks. “Val, uh, don’t you think you’re being a bit too aggressive? You’re turning too hard, and we're pulling like 4gs.” - Bob Kerman “Bob, uh, don’t you think you’re being a bit of a sissy? Aggressive is the only way to fly. You sound just like that airline.” - Valentina Kerman The plane continued to climb until it was out of view of the people watching on the beaches. Outside the plane, it was a bizarre sight. They watched as the world fell behind them, and stared face to face with the void herself. “Would you just look at that view Bob? See, flying super high isn’t that bad!” - Valentina Kerman “Yeah, but how are we going to get back? We’re almost at half a tank, and the Thumper engine ran out of fuel three minutes ago.” - Bob Kerman “Where there’s a will, there’s a way, Bob. By the way, how many Gs can you handle? You know what, nevermind. Just have a vomit bag ready, maybe two.” - Valentina Kerman The plane exceeded all of its expectations, as it reached its highest point at about 22km. However, the plane was about 17km out from the cape, meaning it’d be a trek to get back. Luckily for the mission (but unluckily for Bob), Val made good time. The plane landed safely on the runway, and Valentina emerged perhaps happier than when she boarded. Bob on the other hand was looking extremely green. Val says that the plane flew better than any other she’s flown, and that she can’t wait to go up again. Beyomd has announced that there are at least two more plane flights being prepared, but this time with the CS/T-5 Cougar, the second plane in CalSpace’s supersonic series. The future looks bright for the space program, and Kerbals in space is looking less like a dream, and more like a reachable point. READ NEXT: Jimbo Kerman Found Guilty on All 47 Charges; Faces 60 Years in Prison (pg. 1) | Mysterious Object Crashes in Desert, “It Was Just a Rock” Says Government Astronomers (pg. 5) | Dessert Region Locals Report Seeing Ghost Planes Screaming Across Desert (pg. 7)

Oops, did not mean to post that

I've been listening to a lot of Vulfpeck and funk in general recently.

Clearly you haven’t been reading the papers about its recent controversy.

~KERBAL GAZETTE~ FIRST REPSONDERS ABLE TO COMMUICATE GLOBALLY THANKS TO NEW COMMSAT YEAR 1, DAY 94 - UNISAT-3/Kerbalfund 1 MISSION OBJECTIVE: Place the The Kerbal Fund’s commsat into a high Kerbin orbit LAUNCH VEHICLE: Prima-1 Rocket Quite a while ago, the head of the kermanitarian organization The Kerbal Fund, @Momadance Kerman, placed an order for a commsat, with specifications as to what they want the spacecraft to look like, and what they wanted its flight path to be. They ordered a relay dish to be put on top of the standard UniSat body, and wanted it to be put in an orbit of around ~250km x ~250km orbit. The medium altitude will allow for large swaths of Kerbin to be covered, while still allowing communications to go from surface to dish to surface quickly. It’s the first of a trifecta of satellites, the other two almost finished construction. “We’re proud to be part of a project like this,” said director Kerbalsaurus Kerman. “I believe that projects like these- you know what, I won’t be corny. I’ll just say that it’s nice that people care enough to help others. I’d say many other Kerbals across the planet can learn from The Kerbal Fund.” With the sky clear and Kerbol high, it’s a beautiful day for a launch! “We are GO for orbital insertion!” - Gene Kerman (Flight Director) READ NEXT: Jimbo Kerman’s Quality Products Now Under Heavy Investigation (pg. 1) | Are Napkins a Vegetable? Nutritionist Says They Might Be (pg. 4) | Urbanists Now Argue That Destroying Cities is How We Fix Cities (pg. 9) *** Haha, FINALLY I get this one published. A little behind the scenes, this mission took about seven tries to complete. I kid you not, I faced everything from game crashes to Kracken glitches and even my computer dying, wasting all of my progress. But @Momadance has their first commsat up, so I ca finally progress further. Also, new scatter looks fantastic. I've never been able to run it until now, and I can't believe how much I've missed out on. Unfortunately, there's no more SciFiVE, as that did bog down my computer a lot. Still kind of sad to give that one up. I will be going into a small hiatus as I need to stockpile some missions as well as help set up our house for Christmas, but I'll be back in a week, perhaps even sooner. Also, should I continue that featured ad section? I thought it was fun to make, and it definitely makes the world feel more lived in.

I would not recommend AI, it'd just make the flag look soulless. Your space program is better defined by you, the creator, not a bunch of ones and zeros.

I think this a bug with Scatterer. The skies turn a shiny black, while the seas turn a boiling white. It looks like the rapture. The issue is that you probably have to update it.

You don’t have to draw, you can just use Google Drawings or something. That what I use.

~KERBAL GAZETTE~ KERBALS BREAK THE SOUND BARRIER YEAR 1, DAY 93 - CS/X-5 CHEETA TEST FLIGHT MISSION OBJECTIVE: Break the sound barrier for the first time LAUNCH VEHICLE: CS/X-5 Cheeta CREW: PILOT: Jebediah Kerman NAVIGATOR: Bill Kerman Jebediah and Bill pose for cameras right before takeoff. Always on the cutting, Beyond prepares to send Kerbals faster than the speed of sound for the first time in history! Planes have never been able to break such speeds, as whenever they got close they burn to ashes. Many people have found a cooked well-done pilot in their yards after a they got a little full of themselves. However, a relatively new Aerospace company called CalSpace has created the pinnacle of aircraft engineering. They designed two planes for Beyond: the CS/X-5 Cheeta and the CS/T-5 Cougar, both the fastest planes ever made. The planes have very little practical purposes, and thus are only being used for testing purposes. “I’ve never seen a plane like this before!” Jebediah said. “I might finally face consequences if I destroy this one. It looks expensive.” Hundreds of onlookers watch as the two Kerbals board the plane for this historic flight. Just 15 minutes later, they’re given the all clear for takeoff! “CalSpace 1, you are clear for takeoff!” - Boston Kerman (ATC) “Copy that, Boston! We’re off!” - Jebediah Kerman The crowds cheer as the plane lifts off the runway and into the air! The takeoff was a bit rocky though, to say the least. The plane kept sliding left and right on the runway, making it difficult to control on the ground. Obviously, it got off the ground fine, but quite a few Kerbals were on the edge of their seats. “ATC, we have reached cruising altitude, are we good for drop tank release?” - Bill Kerman “Roger CalSpace 1, you are cleared for drop tank release.” - Boston Kerman “So long, drop tank! Crush some fish for me, will ya?” - Jebediah Kerman With the excess mass released, Jeb levels the plane to a cruising attitude, and then watches as the speedometer slowly counts up to mach 1. It’s a tense moment as it counts up, and everyone holds their breath to see if they make it… “YAHOO, we’re flaming now!” - Jebediah Kerman “What’s that supposed to mean?” - Boston Kerman “It means I- we did it! We’ve broken the sound barrier!” - Jebediah Kerman They did it! Not one, but two Kerbals were traveling at the speed of sound! Kerbals cheered and embraced. This was the fastest anyone’s gone in history, and- BOOM! Suddenly, everyone is thrown off their balance. A loud boom rang across the ocean, and was heard by thousands over several kilometers. This phenomenon is called a sonic boom, which happens when any aircraft breaks the sound barrier. It’s deafeningly loud, and nearby cities and towns suddenly had their windows shattered. Hopefully someone knows a good sealer… The crack team continued to push the plane to its limits, flying higher and faster. In the end, the highest recorded speed was around mach 1.3, but the maximum height wasn’t reached as ATC feared the plane would start to veer into private flight paths. Jeb, however, wasn’t quite content with going back yet, and pulled a few dangerous and potentially expensive stunts. “Jeb, stop skipping the plane! We don’t have the money to replace these!” - Boston Kerman “If Beyond has the money to launch five satellites and two deep space probes in the same quarter, I think you can replace a jet.” - Jebediah Kerman After much bickering, Jeb finally surrendered and made his way back to the KSC. “And… touchdown!” Jebediah Kerman When the two pilots step out of the cockpit, they are met with cheers, excited runway operators, and very annoyed administrators. “If there’s one thing I can’t avoid, it’s making a spectacle,” Jeb told us after landing. “I don’t care if it’s good or bad”. Beyond has once again shattered a technological barrier, and we can’t wait to see what it does next! --------------------------------------------------- Featured Ad: --------------------------------------------------- READ NEXT: Contant 502 Errors Are Affecting the Press (pg. 4) | Explode Co.’s Stocks Suddenly Rise After They Send Mysterious Boxes to Brokers Desks (Pg. 7) | Jimbo Kerman’s Quality Rash Cream Faces Total Recall After Skin Disease Ravages a Town (Pg. 9)

Designing a flag is actually really easy to do yourself, all you need is a 8:5 page and then just just start designing.

I made this for science class to help remember Archaebacteria. It’s crude but it’s worked

Commonwealth