Mr_Brain

I care greatly about the well-being of my kerbals. That's why, as soon as I have the tech, I mostly send probes.

Granted. It's a virtual empire in some horrible browser game. I wish that the sun continues being a star for at least another week.

You should've put up the sign before filling the tanks. Not covered. Environmental activists demanded that the NERVA's reactors be replaced by chemical engines, so we did that, but we didn't have time to put in more fuel and were on a tight schedule. A probe core has gone sentient and was so lonely that it directed the probe back to Kerbin, making mission success impossible.

Granted. You don't know what you're doing and destroy the universe. The universe itself, not just everything in it. There is no more universe. I wish for the ability to manipulate chewing gum however I please.

Kerbal fans are a fandom. It's just very small.

Granted. As a side effect, someone throws a pie in your face. It tastes horrible. I wish that I receive a tasty and healthy cookie.

Granted. However, you have to pay for all of those games. And you like none of them. I wish that I receive a useless button.

Granted. The kerbal experiments with a pencil and a paperclip, causing a violent explosion in your home. I wish for non-explosive paperclips.

Granted. However, in a few decades, just before you die, you realize that this sentence would've contained the perfect life philosophy for you and you die horribly unhappy. I wish for something harmless.

It's too early in planning to know any details about the costs. The goal of this project isn't only to put something kerbal into space, but also to do something useful with it. A rocket that does nothing but put a little KSP flag into space for a minute or two is more of a waste of resources than a scientific experiment that hasn't been done before.

I'm pretty sure they have organs to turn dark energy, quantum vacuum virtual plasma and neutrino radiation into usable energy.

Granted. It is complete, but of such low quality that you are fired/fail the class/have to endure other negative consequences. I wish for a rainbow.

Granted. The water inside you evaporates and takes up a much larger volume now. You explode (as does everyone else, and everything alive else, and really, why would you wish for something like that!?). I wish for all previous wishes to be undone.

Are you sure that after you do that, Gilly won't orbit the asteroid?

I am not sure how the OP's instructions are going to help with naming rockets. Are you suggesting to name rockets after, in your example, a melee weapon from another video game?

Granted. You receive an extra hour at night to sleep, but can only sleep in that hour. You soon suffer from severe sleep deprivation. I wish for the color green to exist.

It can be used as reaction mass for spacecraft! When thrown hard enough, that is.

Granted. They are better.... at colliding with you and your things and ships at very high velocities. I wish I had a normal, non-dangerous, edible potato.

I refuse to put any other than the ones I have to in danger! Well, as soon as I have them. In the career I started for 0.90.0, I recruited Billy-Bobcous because I wanted a scientist on a mission and I didn't want Bob to be sent out just after he had landed the last mission, so you see, I don't impose recruitment limitations upon myself, but kerbal employment limits: give them rest and don't put them in too much danger when a probe core can do the job as well.

Isn't there a cheaper part you can use as a one-part craft, "launch" it and get the contract reward for putting something (and even if it's just a non-controlled girder) on the launchpad? That'll give you enough funds for the capsule, if I'm not mistaken.

It has a knife feature!

Zat's not my department! says Wernher von Kerman. Austria, Europe.

It may be worth noting that, while the kerbals can see what landing on Jool does to them, they consider it ascension to a higher form of being. After all, if it's so big and so green, what else would it do to kerbals? This is why they don't object to Danny2462 heading the space program.

It can be used as a paperweight!

And it can even be used to open coconuts when dropped from high enough!