55delta Posted March 1, 2017 Share Posted March 1, 2017 "Yes, we want our astronauts to be prepared for all occasions. It's not unreasonable for us to add a stock of rifles, grenades, and a missile launcher to the supplies for this mission." "Due to cost overruns in our tourist program, we have decided to cut out the return portion of the journey." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0111narwhalz Posted March 1, 2017 Share Posted March 1, 2017 14 hours ago, 55delta said: "Yes, we want our astronauts to be prepared for all occasions. It's not unreasonable for us to add a stock of rifles, grenades, and a missile launcher to the supplies for this mission." No, but Roscosmos said something very similar. Just in Russian, I assume. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kerbiloid Posted March 2, 2017 Share Posted March 2, 2017 (edited) "Ook. Ook? Ook, ook. Ook!" Discworld 8 hours ago, 0111narwhalz said: No, but Roscosmos said something very similar. Just in Russian, I assume. This was earlier. Spoiler Now, according to this, there are Makarov pistols in Soyuz standard package. So, space pirates have no chance. Fly Soyuz and get a pistol and cookie. While that their Dragon has no-o-othing! Edited March 2, 2017 by kerbiloid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
55delta Posted March 2, 2017 Share Posted March 2, 2017 23 hours ago, 55delta said: "Yes, we want our astronauts to be prepared for all occasions. It's not unreasonable for us to add a stock of rifles, grenades, and a missile launcher to the supplies for this mission." How very interesting...you were thinking Russia, I was thinking It: The Terror From Beyond Space. Same difference, just a matter of degrees (of both direction and over-kill.) Let's see what else I can think of... "We knew the design was flawed, but we put our newest rocket design on the launch pad anyway just to see how big the explosion would be." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
munlander1 Posted March 2, 2017 Share Posted March 2, 2017 The rocket exploded. Have a nice day! walks out* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kerbiloid Posted March 2, 2017 Share Posted March 2, 2017 "Bada-bada-boo-o-om!!!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benjamin Kerman Posted March 2, 2017 Share Posted March 2, 2017 The Unplanned Vehicular Dissasembly was actually planned, and we meant to do that. Have a nice day! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spacetraindriver Posted March 2, 2017 Share Posted March 2, 2017 Our Delta IV heavy just blew up the launch pad but the rocket is ok, so we'll just continue with the launch... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
55delta Posted March 3, 2017 Share Posted March 3, 2017 "...this engine will be powered by a combination of Chlorine Trifluoride and Ozone..." "Seeing as we have no way of sending a rescue to our stranded astronauts, we are declaring the landing site the first space colony. Currently efforts are underway to salvage everything possible from the damaged lander." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WinkAllKerb'' Posted March 4, 2017 Share Posted March 4, 2017 (edited) "All you need is to ensure a black hole gonna poo what you want it to poo ^^ but that's how birds used to sort undigestable/digestable seeds through winter to spring" Edited March 4, 2017 by WinkAllKerb'' Douable You See ^^ simple somehow it happen every day all the time whatever the being scale ^^ even if only biped use WC for instance ^^ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
septemberWaves Posted March 5, 2017 Share Posted March 5, 2017 "So, we'll use this moon for a gravity capture into the planet's orbit. The spacecraft will fly by at a nice safe distance of five meters above the surface." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
55delta Posted March 7, 2017 Share Posted March 7, 2017 "We decided to put the destination of our next manned flight up for public vote." "They were killed, but to be fair, it was a really awesome explosion." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
p1t1o Posted March 7, 2017 Share Posted March 7, 2017 "Welp, we convinced them space was real Stan, you owe me a dollar." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
55delta Posted March 10, 2017 Share Posted March 10, 2017 "The purpose of this program is to combat climate change by re-directing an asteroid into a collision with Earth." "We will not comment on any baseless rumours concerning this failed launch and the range-safety officer." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kerbiloid Posted March 10, 2017 Share Posted March 10, 2017 "Ladies and gentlemen! 100 years ago we have sent a ship to Alpha Centauri, and now we receive a signal from it!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
55delta Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 "We have decided to cease all manned spaceflight." "There was a mis-communication concerning the size and scale of our new rocket first stages. We have donated these stages to our own model rocket club." "Our contractor made an error and shipped two first stages that are attached together. Regardless, we intent to integrate and launch this vehicle to see how far we can take it." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Junior Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 "Tucker did it." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
munlander1 Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 "We pushed the wrong button..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
max_creative Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 "TRAPPIST-1 doesn't have seven Earth-sized exoplanets orbiting it! It has seven Starkiller Bases! They're all shooting lasers at Ear-" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
munlander1 Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 Well, the reason why are rocket hit the city was because the rso was in the bathroom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benjamin Kerman Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 The lander is on its side, but that's ok because we have KIS and KAS installed, and the astronauts are all equipped with electric skrewdrivers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rkarmark Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 We just blew up florida in our last attemt to launch Best wishes Nasa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axilourous Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 (edited) "Jake got stranded on the Moon, luckily we have Extraplanetary Launchpads installed, so we can build a rescue vehicle in orbit. The only problem is it would cost to much to do that, so we decided to make it a Moon colony." Edited March 13, 2017 by Axilourous Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andetch Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 "Spaceplane flight XQ070 burnt up on ascent to orbit because the pilot was playing football manager on his smart phone and forgot to throttle down" True KSP story Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axilourous Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 1 minute ago, Andetch said: "Spaceplane flight XQ070 burnt up on ascent to orbit because the pilot was playing football manager on his smart phone and forgot to throttle down" True KSP story lol "Flight K-79 has taken off succesfully, but 2 minutes into the flight the pilots jumped out and an asteroid hit Space Plane K-79" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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