totm nov 2023 Thread to discuss negative things in a very general way, just see where it goes y'know?

[Nuke]

currently locked out of my paypal account for being anti-phone. some years ago i was frustrated by not being able to use a longer password with more entropy. now they have implemented forced sms 2 factor and no option to use another method. i use a totp extension for my browser for some things and really like it (mostly because i can run it on a proper computer). id complain about it more but there is a cat in the way.

[DDE]

 

[StrandedonEarth]

I think a gremlin punched in for his shift and was assigned to me this morning, because it’s been one minor hiccup after another from as soon as I got up at 3am….

The first thing I do is walk my dog while I have a smoke, only to find I’m out of poop bags and my lighter is dead  

Then I pour coffee for everyone, but the dishwasher wasn’t run so I have to rinse out the three travel mugs. Again, minor inconvenience. 

Tale something out of the fridge, liquid spills on the floor and my sock. Change sock after wiping up mess

At work, shortly after starting I make a fixable mistake, but while fixing it I slice my fingertip, short but deep. 

I think the gremlin was satisfied at last and clocked out, since no more hiccups since. Or it  possessed a coworker, who started organizing my work flow  in a way that was not how I would have done it. Again, no biggie, just slows me down a touch while I (hopefully remember to) make adjustments. 

/vent

Aaaah, I feel better now 

[StrandedonEarth]

7 hours ago, StrandedonEarth said:

I think a gremlin punched in for his shift and was assigned to me this morning, because it’s been one minor hiccup after another from as soon as I got up at 3am….

Actually, the more I think about it, the more I think it was a trainee gremlin.....

7 hours ago, StrandedonEarth said:

The first thing I do is walk my dog while I have a smoke, only to find I’m out of poop bags and my lighter is dead  

"Really, kid, that's all you got? You should have drained his backup lighter too..."

7 hours ago, StrandedonEarth said:

Then I pour coffee for everyone, but the dishwasher wasn’t run so I have to rinse out the three travel mugs. Again, minor inconvenience. 

"See, that's how it's done. I distracted them from running it last night. Now he's grumbling..."

7 hours ago, StrandedonEarth said:

Tale something out of the fridge, liquid spills on the floor and my sock. Change sock after wiping up mess

"That's better; now he's getting annoyed at having two things to do from that one drip of lunch-meat juice"

7 hours ago, StrandedonEarth said:

At work, shortly after starting I make a fixable mistake, but while fixing it I slice my fingertip, short but deep. 

"Oh hey, that was a deft touch re-adjusting his machine behind his back, he even thinks he messed up hims- hey WHOA STOP!! Whaddaya think you're doing!?!? This isn't Looney Tunes and that ain't Bugs Bunny; gremprentices are not allowed to hurt the clients! Good thing he didn't cut his fingertip off or we'd be out in the sun without any shade! Now back to the spawning pool with you!"

Edited August 25, 2021 by StrandedonEarth

[Nuke]

to think a whole generation of people who dont know how a mop works. 

[TheSaint]

22 minutes ago, Nuke said:

to think a whole generation of people who dont know how a mop works. 

They probably can't tell you why push brooms have two holes in the head either.

[kerbiloid]

Some stuff for quidditch.

Edited August 26, 2021 by kerbiloid

[DDE]

3 hours ago, TheSaint said:

They probably can't tell you why push brooms have two holes in the head either.

We're waiting for Elon's promised domestic androids.

[kerbiloid]

Those Tesla androids + brooms remind me of the now-old story.

Spoiler

 

 

[StrandedonEarth]

8 hours ago, TheSaint said:

They probably can't tell you why push brooms have two holes in the head either.

Lefty and righty, of course! 

 

[DDE]

Well, that was a pretty close call for the driver

 

[Chemp]

15 hours ago, Nuke said:

to think a whole generation of people who dont know how a mop works. 

I first read: "don't know how a map works", and immediately thought of about half the people I know.

Read your sentence again, and still couldn't agree more.

Edited August 26, 2021 by Chemp
typo

[TheSaint]

5 hours ago, StrandedonEarth said:

Lefty and righty, of course! 

Nope. If you look they're perfectly opposed, one on each side. When you push the broom for a long time, the bristles bend. And when they bend too much they get to the point where the broom doesn't work as well anymore, the bristles are bent too far away from the direction of travel. When that happens, you unscrew the handle from the one hole and screw it in to the other hole. Now the bristles are bent into the direction the broom is being pushed, and the broom works again. Extends the life of the broom head. Learned that from my old man, who pushed a broom his whole life so I wouldn't have to.

[StrandedonEarth]

1 hour ago, TheSaint said:

Nope. If you look they're perfectly opposed, one on each side. When you push the broom for a long time, the bristles bend. And when they bend too much they get to the point where the broom doesn't work as well anymore, the bristles are bent too far away from the direction of travel. When that happens, you unscrew the handle from the one hole and screw it in to the other hole. Now the bristles are bent into the direction the broom is being pushed, and the broom works again. Extends the life of the broom head. Learned that from my old man, who pushed a broom his whole life so I wouldn't have to.

Usually  means I’m joking. I could have made it an ethnic joke but that would have been frowned upon. My actual guess wasn’t far off; a spare  hole for when the broomstick inevitably breaks off. 

Flipping a worn tool is standard practice in many industries; I flip my tool bits when they get dull and then  it’s sometimes sharper than when brand new.  It is also common to flip a gear wheel when it starts to crack, so that the crack is pushed closed instead of pulled open,  while waiting for a new part to arrive. 

It hadn’t occurred to me to apply that logic to broom heads, as the brooms around my work generally get destroyed before the bristles are too bent

 

[kerbiloid]

Young people know about the brooms much more than you think.

Spoiler

 

 

[TheSaint]

31 minutes ago, kerbiloid said:

Young people know about the brooms much more than you think.

  Hide contents

 

 

Quidditch: The sport invented by someone who very obviously had never watched a full day of sports in their life.

[Nuke]

22 hours ago, DDE said:

We're waiting for Elon's promised domestic androids.

well when they make a roomba that can climb stairs and clean up cat vomit, i might get one. 

[Nuke]

On 8/25/2021 at 6:48 PM, TheSaint said:

They probably can't tell you why push brooms have two holes in the head either.

thats so you can minimize the wear on the bristles. 

this thing, which used to be one of those things taught in home ec back before schools all got all woke. or on your first day on a janitorial job. or if you apprenticed for any profession that makes a mess. i personally learned it from my grandma, who as bad as she was at raising children, always had an immaculate house. 

Edited August 27, 2021 by Nuke
castrated by spellcheck

[kerbiloid]

1 hour ago, Nuke said:

23 hours ago, DDE said:

We're waiting for Elon's promised domestic androids.

well when they make a roomba that can climb stairs and clean up cat vomit, i might get one. 

Spoiler

 

 

[Dan Kerman]

My wife is cursed with all things technical. Anything with batteries dies quickly. I upgraded to a new computer and gave her my old one. 3 months later it has all sorts of issues with graphics drivers. Even after I fix it, it constantly locks up. Got her a new phone... she drops and broke her old one... setup seems to run fine. Nope! Some of her music doesn't play and her contact list is incomplete. Never ends. /rant off

[DDE]

A junior colleague at work: "Your phone isn't even cracked. How is that even possible?"

Me an hour later: *drops phone on hardtop pavement*

Spoiler

Also me an hour later: "Not today!"

I'm in the market for an out-of-production latex case. Or five.

 

Edited September 5, 2021 by DDE

[kerbiloid]

How did he know?

A time traveller?
A prophet?
A warlock?

A jinxer?

[DDE]

5 minutes ago, kerbiloid said:

How did he know?

A time traveller?
A prophet?
A warlock?

A jinxer?

Do not inquire too deeply into the ways of womankind.

[kerbiloid]

18 minutes ago, DDE said:

Do not inquire too deeply into the ways of womankind.

Ah, a woman. The famous woman intuition.

First they feel what should happen, then you are guilty if didn't.

 

Edited September 5, 2021 by kerbiloid

[Nuke]

old cat walked off last night and didnt return. he was in a bad way. aside from the way he was rapidly losing muscle mass over the last few months and was all fur and bones. i suspect he was in renal failure because the way he kept going to the litter box without much progress. he was letting out painful meows through out the day.  he had a dark red discharge from his nose i had to clean up twice that morning. we were talking about going to the vet to have him put down. id just finished cleaning the house and was in the process of hauling out trash and the cats all decided it was time to go outside. but it wasn't long before we noticed old cat was gone. he probibly crawled under someone's house to wait for the inevitable, as old dying animals tend to do. we waited until bed time for him to return. i put a towel in a box in case he came back and left a dish of cat treats near the box and rigged up a 5ghz surveillance camera in case he came home in the night. but i never saw him nor was the box slept in or the treats eaten. it rained and the tempurature got below 50f,  so im going to go take a tour of his usually hiding places again today see if i can find him, but things dont look good.  he either found a place to die, got picked up by doo gooders who didnt know any better, or by an eagle or a bear. 

Edited September 6, 2021 by Nuke