The Upcoming Movies (and Movie Trailers) MegaThread!

[TheSaint]

On 9/2/2021 at 9:21 AM, Minmus Taster said:

"You see it's we said we would go to the moon BUT WHAT IF, the moon came to US! Sometimes my genius is almost frightening"

-This films pitch meeting-

Thing #2 watched this with me just now and said, "Despicable Me did it better." LOL

[DDE]

1 hour ago, Spacescifi said:

Or better yet.... BATMAN versus the moon (as in memetic with prep time Batman)?

People would watch just to see how in the world he pulls it off... because the rest of the league are on vacation for some reason LOL.

He teams up with Iron Man.

The weight of resulting litigation is sufficient to use as a planetary gravity tractor.

[kerbiloid]

2 hours ago, StrandedonEarth said:

In the 2200s.... They're still flying Shuttle Orbiters?

1. It's Starshio, properly evolved.

2. They had to, after the Starship failed,

1 hour ago, Spacescifi said:

Godzilla versus... THE MOON!

Moonzilla. It lives there, in the lunar sea,

Spoiler

 

[Minmus Taster]

Pick the scroll option and you can continue a life of dreams.

Pick the "reveal spoiler" and Il show you how deep this rabbit hole goes.

Spoiler

What I love about that scene is that in retrospect you really can't tell which one was the better choice.

 

[TheSaint]

3 hours ago, Minmus Taster said:

Pick the scroll option and you can continue a life of dreams.

Pick the "reveal spoiler" and Il show you how deep this rabbit hole goes.

  Hide contents

What I love about that scene is that in retrospect you really can't tell which one was the better choice.

 

Gotta make the RV payment....

[tater]

 

[Nuke]

very gwar-like. i like it. 

[jimmymcgoochie]

Independence Day (2)- massive alien spaceship that’s nearly as wide as the Earth but is a flat disc manages to create a gravitational anomaly that picks up Kuaua Lumpur and Dubai (or at least the Petronius Towers and Burj Khalifa) and drops them on London, despite clearly landing in the northern hemisphere and never going close to either Kuala Lumpur and Dubai and if it had enough gravity to pick those buildings up the whole Earth would have turned inside out by that point.

2012- Relies entirely on a debunked theory of the Earth’s structure then shoehorns it into plate tectonics despite the two being fundamentallyincompatible, and also magic neutrinos heat up the Earth’s core so massive chunks of land just collapse into massive hollows under the bedrock.

Day after tomorrow- within 48 hours of the Gulf Stream being blocked the entire northern hemisphere is frozen over (but the Southern Hemisphere is untouched?).

Based on that record, aliens yeeting the Moon down under the Earth’s Roche limit is only marginally more nonsensical.

[TheSaint]

4 hours ago, jimmymcgoochie said:

Independence Day (2)- massive alien spaceship that’s nearly as wide as the Earth but is a flat disc manages to create a gravitational anomaly that picks up Kuaua Lumpur and Dubai (or at least the Petronius Towers and Burj Khalifa) and drops them on London, despite clearly landing in the northern hemisphere and never going close to either Kuala Lumpur and Dubai and if it had enough gravity to pick those buildings up the whole Earth would have turned inside out by that point.

2012- Relies entirely on a debunked theory of the Earth’s structure then shoehorns it into plate tectonics despite the two being fundamentallyincompatible, and also magic neutrinos heat up the Earth’s core so massive chunks of land just collapse into massive hollows under the bedrock.

Day after tomorrow- within 48 hours of the Gulf Stream being blocked the entire northern hemisphere is frozen over (but the Southern Hemisphere is untouched?).

Based on that record, aliens yeeting the Moon down under the Earth’s Roche limit is only marginally more nonsensical.

You're assuming we didn't mock those movies as well.

No Laurence Fishburne. No Hugo Weaving. And, most importantly, we all know where the rabbit hole leads this time. I'm going to give it a solid, "Meh."

[DDE]

23 minutes ago, TheSaint said:

No Laurence Fishburne. No Hugo Weaving. And, most importantly, we all know where the rabbit hole leads this time. I'm going to give it a solid, "Meh."

That's more sequel red flags than a Young Pioneer rally.

[Minmus Taster]

3 hours ago, TheSaint said:

You're assuming we didn't mock those movies as well.

No Laurence Fishburne. No Hugo Weaving. And, most importantly, we all know where the rabbit hole leads this time. I'm going to give it a solid, "Meh."

Still gonna go see it.

Finding out where the hole leads is a lot more fun than thinking about it.

Even if we know where it's probably going

[kerbiloid]

Matrix. Now on Windows 11 and DirectX 13.

[kerbiloid]

Kate (2021)

So, the bars in Japan diners have anisotropic physical properties.

When the mafia is shooting at the bar with the heroine behind it, the bar stops the bullets.

But when the heroine makes a single shot from a pistol with silencer from behind, the bullet makes an inch-wide hole in the bar, and a leg bone, to boot.

***

And the street wires.

When a bad guy unwillingly hangs on them, it causes sparkles and other electricity.

But when the heroine is doing the same a minute later, nothing happens. Because the human will can resist electricity.

Edited September 11, 2021 by kerbiloid

[DDE]

7 hours ago, kerbiloid said:

But when the heroine is doing the same a minute later, nothing happens. Because the human will can resist electricity.

I mean, someone had to one-up the indestructible ScarJo from Black Widow.

[kerbiloid]

22 minutes ago, DDE said:

I mean, someone had to one-up the indestructible ScarJo from Black Widow.

After burning the huge extraterrestrial monster with a bottle of whiskey sitting inside the tentacled car at several tens meters from ground (because the hard-protected vault is just set on fire with the maniac inside) in Cloverfield-2, just some high-voltage wires arer nothing for MarElizWin,

As a last resort, she can just teleport like in Faults.

[Nuke]

13 hours ago, kerbiloid said:

Kate (2021)

So, the bars in Japan diners have anisotropic physical properties.

When the mafia is shooting at the bar with the heroine behind it, the bar stops the bullets.

But when the heroine makes a single shot from a pistol with silencer from behind, the bullet makes an inch-wide hole in the bar, and a leg bone, to boot.

***

And the street wires.

When a bad guy unwillingly hangs on them, it causes sparkles and other electricity.

But when the heroine is doing the same a minute later, nothing happens. Because the human will can resist electricity.

hax!

[Minmus Taster]

So on a sort of side not Iv been reading reviews for Dune.

It's umm...I can't really tell if the consensus is good or bad.

In a way that's even worse beca- *sudden violent Last Jedi flashback

[DDE]

1 hour ago, Minmus Taster said:

*sudden violent Last Jedi flashback

Googles "shellshocked Oscar Isaac"

[Nuke]

2 hours ago, Minmus Taster said:

So on a sort of side not Iv been reading reviews for Dune.

It's umm...I can't really tell if the consensus is good or bad.

In a way that's even worse beca- *sudden violent Last Jedi flashback

i find when the 'movie people' reach a consensus about something, it usually mean that its so bad that only 'movie people' will like it. case in point, the oscars. those movies tend to be long and drawn out and leave me with a 'what did i watch this crap' feeling at the end. 

but this is dune so i will probibly like it even if they screw it up horribly. then again if they do whats been done to star trek and star wars, then we might have a situation. 

[kerbiloid]

May Riddick come to Dune!

Let them make a crossover, to let the bald ninja show to those talkative addicts whose are spice and worms!

[DDE]

11 hours ago, Nuke said:

i find when the 'movie people' reach a consensus about something, it usually mean that its so bad that only 'movie people' will like it. case in point, the oscars. those movies tend to be long and drawn out and leave me with a 'what did i watch this crap' feeling at the end. 

It's a guild. You've got to know the right people and espouse the right opinions in order to gain that legitimacy - and maybe even access. With Youtube elminating the entry bar, the last refuge of this guild is schoolyard cliquishness, especially for bit players. The petty politics of film criticism vloggers - who interect heavily with the general kind of political vloggers - are utterly nasty.

[DDE]

A Peter the Great biopic titled The Birth of an Empire.

https://www.belpressa.ru/culture/shou-biznes/39194.html

Hmm... once translated into English, the name sounds very unfortunate.

(given who the director is, and the involvement of the studio of the notorious money-grubber Nikita Mikhalkov, I don't have high hopes for the actual product either)

[Nuke]

4 hours ago, DDE said:

A Peter the Great biopic titled The Birth of an Empire.

https://www.belpressa.ru/culture/shou-biznes/39194.html

Hmm... once translated into English, the name sounds very unfortunate.

(given who the director is, and the involvement of the studio of the notorious money-grubber Nikita Mikhalkov, I don't have high hopes for the actual product either)

that movie (the birth of a nation) wasn't terrible, if you ignore the fact that the klan were the "good guys".  it actually had some impressive battle scenes at the beginning. at least impressive for the silent film era. there are those who would permanently delete it from existence for pushing the racist point of view, which amounts to book burning imho (a policy embraced by fascists, communists, and religious zealots alike). i mean you do that you might as well burn any movie made before ww2, a few after and all the walt disney era disney films as well. that's just no bueno for anyone who respects film history.

[kerbiloid]

Dune (2021)

(Spoilers?)

Spoiler

0. How can they have these online casinos on Dune when the computers are prohibited?
The mentats are mentally playing online the mental poker?
Mentally shuffling and dealing the cards in mind and taking each other's word?

1. Moar parades. As moar as possible.
Any parade makes the movie cheaper because all you need is a row of boxes called ships and numberless rows of standing bots called soldiers.
Don't know how to film a parade? Watch the Starship Troopers and do as close as possible.

2. Moar dust.  As moar as possible.
Dust particles cost nothing but electricity for CPU and can hide avoid unnecessary graphic details and also look dramatically.

3. Moar flashbacks and hallucinations. As moar as possible.
They are cheap and simple because anyway nobody can see them clearly.
At last, don't they have a desert trip? They do. 
Btw, was this Chani real of hallunicinated? The previous chanies were not just visible, but even tactile. Especially the mini-series one.

4. Moar close-ups. As moar as possible.
The close-ups are cheap. All you need to make a dramatic close-up is to move aside the pizza box and push the make-up artist from the table.

5. Moar dramatic face close-ups. As moar as possible.
The dramatic face adds moar pathos for free, and theoretically the actor even doesn't need to change the T-shirt of wash the neck.
(Still better do that, because it's cheaper to dress the actor once and film all its parts together.)

6. Still can't get if the brave rainbow warrior Baron Harkonnen is a protagonist or an antagonist.
On the one hand, he is a villain because he tries to rob (what they robbed from him).
On the other hand, he is rather optimistic and body-positive.
So, probably now the cultural ambiguity turns this character from originally negative to complex and dramatic.

7. Where is the movie final?

 

Edited September 18, 2021 by kerbiloid

[Nuke]

14 hours ago, kerbiloid said:

Dune (2021)

(Spoilers?)

  Hide contents

0. How can they have these online casinos on Dune when the computers are prohibited?
The mentats are mentally playing online the mental poker?
Mentally shuffling and dealing the cards in mind and taking each other's word?

1. Moar parades. As moar as possible.
Any parade makes the movie cheaper because all you need is a row of boxes called ships and numberless rows of standing bots called soldiers.
Don't know how to film a parade? Watch the Starship Troopers and do as close as possible.

2. Moar dust.  As moar as possible.
Dust particles cost nothing but electricity for CPU and can hide avoid unnecessary graphic details and also look dramatically.

3. Moar flashbacks and hallucinations. As moar as possible.
They are cheap and simple because anyway nobody can see them clearly.
At last, don't they have a desert trip? They do. 
Btw, was this Chani real of hallunicinated? The previous chanies were not just visible, but even tactile. Especially the mini-series one.

4. Moar close-ups. As moar as possible.
The close-ups are cheap. All you need to make a dramatic close-up is to move aside the pizza box and push the make-up artist from the table.

5. Moar dramatic face close-ups. As moar as possible.
The dramatic face adds moar pathos for free, and theoretically the actor even doesn't need to change the T-shirt of wash the neck.
(Still better do that, because it's cheaper to dress the actor once and film all its parts together.)

6. Still can't get if the brave rainbow warrior Baron Harkonnen is a protagonist or an antagonist.
On the one hand, he is a villain because he tries to rob (what they robbed from him).
On the other hand, he is rather optimistic and body-positive.
So, probably now the cultural ambiguity turns this character from originally negative to complex and dramatic.

7. Where is the movie final?

 

i think a lot of this crap is because they had to re-hype the movie due to the pandemic. this should have come out last christmas, they should all have oscars and they should be working on part 2 right now.  bad germs, bad! i think ive watched over 20-30 different trailers for the movie already. there is also a rumor of a 5 hour directors cut. also in a cruel quirk of fate our one screen movie theater broke down and i hope they get it up and running again in time for the dune release, id hate to have to stream it, after all ive been waiting on this movie for well over a decade. 

i kind of like the baron this time around. he is not an annoying like the old movie and not bland like in the miniseries and certainly not fruity like would have happened to orson wells in jordowski's dune (i know i didnt spell that right). keep him grimdark and sadistic which is the image i had in my mind when i read the books. they picked the perfect actor. i like to think of him as the big guy in prison who always gets what he wants, and then elevated to a position of great power. make giedi prime great again!

with regards to fruty i am glad they dropped the medieval attire . i like the militaristic atradies uniforms.  i really like the spacesuit styled guild uniforms, at least that's what i think those are. idk why nobody ever thought of that before. these guys live and work in space most of the time so why wouldn't you wear your life support gear like the fremen.  the fremen outfits look nice and utilitarian but it kind of has a superhero vibe (that codpiece) that i don't really like. dune is supposed to be a deconstruction of the superhero genre, sort of like watchmen (which is probibly why i liked watchmen when my usual attitude towards superhero films is usually meh).  i guess they could be worse, the miniseries stillsuits that look like scorpion from mortal combat took his outfit to the cleaners and they used too much bleach, and the 80s ones looked like something you would wear to judas preist concert. i always felt like they should be bulkier as they contain heat exchangers and evaporators and i hope an entire wastewater processing plant. the bene gesserit are done like in the book, and i believe they are the only ones with a good literary reference to their appearance to go on and all 3 dunes they came out as expected (though the shaved heads and abilities of the first ones was definitely non canon). 

but damn that soundtrack is something else. sometimes it seems like a throw back to the theme song for alien nation, with a little klingon opera thrown in. they even actually went through the trouble of coming up with lyrics in galach for their choiral arrangements. this is everything i like about scifi music. still cant wait to see gurney hallack jamming on his baliset. i kind of thought they should cast lemmy for this role so he could play ace of spades for liet kynes, but i guess that dream got shelved along with lemmy's hat and urn. i have to admit i did not hate toto's soundtrack for '80s dune, but this blows it out of the ballpark. 

i love the vehicles in this movie too. the 'thopters are excelent. i mean sure the troop transports are kind of boxy. i mean they ride on suspensors so they hold altitude and decelerate slow and dont have to go through the usual heat of re-entry. the guild heighliner is something completely different, it looks more like the no-ship on the cover of chapterhouse. descriptions of space hardware are kind of vague in the book otherwise. so i guess they went with the only image they had. the big metal tube from 80s and the more detaled and i think more practical centrifuge design from the miniseries is out. and think about it, they have anti-gravity technology so it makes sense that they would also have anti-anti-gravity technology as well. some references (i believe the dune encyclopedia) do mention that they use torch ships like in the expanse, but this is really never mentioned in the books or shown. and since very little in the duniverse happens in space i can forgive them glossing over the space ships a bit. though special node i do like the imperial ship at the beginning, kinda has a union class (battletech) vibe to it (i almost expect an atlas to walk down the ramp, though i do have a fan theory that battletech and dune take place in the same universe crosspost from mwo board below if interested).

Spoiler

i have a theory that the battletech universe actually takes place in the dune universe.

k-f drive is effectively lostech and is no longer in use by the time of the butlerian jiahd. ftl drives in this time period are slow and it takes months or even years to move troops around, this is a completely different technology woefully inferior to k-f or holtzman. holtzman engines are essentially derpy k-f engines (the drive minus the computerized control system, which is already illegal by the time of its re-invention). heighliners are essentially jumpships.

sandworms are actually a clan genetic enginering side project gone wrong. various dune books seem to indicate that the sandworms were transplanted to arrakis a long time ago, but this is never explained. tleilaxu genetic engineering technology also comes from the clans.

the bene geserit are essentially an offshot of comstar. their quest for a kwizatz haderach is essentially their attempt to gain access to blake's other memory.

the cymech's in use by the titans are actually the last few remaining battlemechs in existence, modified to be operated by the disembodied brains of the titans. these were also mechs they used before they removed their brains. the neural interface tech they use is an evolution of the neurohelmet.

hpg technology is never re-discovered and so communication in the duniverse is by messanger only.

alien life forms do exist in both universes, but they are rare and seldom of human equivalent intelligence.

the years between 3151 and 6041 lostech progresses, hpg stops working in the dark ages, eventually it is lost to time. jumpships are also lost but in the intervening years a new type of ftl is invented, its a lot slower. this changes the power structures and the great houses are essentially stripped down to minor house status due to the limits of the new drive tech and their ability to control their own territory is greatly diminished. the inner sphere expands and battlemechs fall out of favor as advances in ai allow for mechs to be automated. at this point humans are removed from conflict and fall into apathy. some angsty nerds (the titans) haxxor these robots and use them to enslave large numbers of star systems. to control their now huge emipre, they write an ai to take control of everything this starting the synchronized machine empire, and inadvertantly give it too much power and find themselves enslaved. and now you are where the dune prequels pick up.

as for the flashbacks (forwards, prescience dude), i dont think you can tell the dune story without them. as for the dust, hell at least they are using practical effects and not being all cgi like the miniseries (worst sandworms ever) and you arent pan and scanning the concept art in lieu of a budget sufficient for modelcraft.  as for the mentats, those are your computer nerds in lieu of computers. it will be interesting to see how they portray an unplugged society to a bunch of smartphone zombies.