Jump to content

Kerbal Death Note


Mars-Bound Hokie

Recommended Posts

Ujjbpiyv Kerman was tanning on Moho. He then went for a walk. He saw a cliff and with joy leaped foreword, hoping his EVA pack would save him. However he was out of fuel and he crashed into the Moho Hole. He exploded.

Donald  Kerman.

Broken landing gear.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Donald  Kerman was flying along the beach when he got the idea to kick his landing gear. So he hop'ed out and kick them.

Then he died. :(

 

Jim Kerman. Reentry heating

Edited by ZinkBot
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Jim was on board KST 001 (kerbal shuttle transport) when it renterd the atmosphere. Just like the Columbia shuttle disaster, the heat shield was broken. The shuttle disinagrated while returning to kerbin. He died almost instantly.

Richard Kerman will be the victim of an engine throttle malfunction (stuck at max thrust).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Space Program was getting low on funds. Mort was obviously angry. In fact, they were so low on funds that they could only do one more mission- and that mission had to be small.

So, what did they do? They designed a small and cheap SSTO, wich had just barely enough fuel to go to the Mun and back. The idea of the mission was to do a vertical landing through a Mun arch and restore public support with such an epic maneuver! The pilot for the mission was Richard Kerman. Incredibly, the untested SSTO got into orbit fine. And it also got into Mun orbit just fine! When it came time for the landing, it was supposed to be a suicide burn landing.

And, Richard did it fine! He went perfectly through the Mun arch, and from then on it was smooth sailing. But, when Richard, was supposed to lower the thrust for final descent, he accidentally pulled the throttle stick out of its socket! (The construction crews had botched it.) The SSTO then crashed to the Mun Arch. Ouchie.

 

The Space Program was finished.

 

A kerbonaut training simulator is the direct or indirect cod* of Kggchh Kerman

* cod means cause of death

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Kggchh Kerman was playing pilot wings 64, which he tough was an accurate realistic flight simulator. When he tried to jet pack into a ballon in real life he slammed into the ballon and fell to the ground because his jet-pack was out of fuel.

Binglebottom Kerman will be attacked by paper airplanes.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Binglebottom Kerman was hiking in the dense forests of Kinland, a northern, cold, and very foresty place on Kerbin. He was so happy to be there, that he started to sing. Unfortunately, near him was a shoal of paperplanes- normally calm and beautiful creatures, but loud noises make 'em angry. These paperplanes got so angry that they attacked Binglebottom and killed him to death.

Ross Kerman the painter will be kil by a happy little accident

Edited by Maria Sirona
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Doge Kerman invented a magical snack making machine. Jeb Kerman, being rich, bought 5 000 000. Which added up to $ 500 000 000. When the money arrived in 5 dollar bills doge drowned.

Billy-Bobwise will watch too much TV from a really good show.

Edited by Stormpilot
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Bobby-bill grew up in the desert country. He studied hard and was very interested in space flight. He joined the Kerbal Forces at 17 and after completing BKQ training he began specific train. After completed 5 years later he was assigned to fly the ST-1, a supersonic transport used for transporting Kerbin officials around kerbin. About 3 years later, the KSP was in need of astronauts for the “stupidity” program, which was to put the first Kerbal into space. After doing the vigorous selection process he was chosen, And since this is an alternate universe, he beat jeb to be #0001. He was so exited he died the end.

WillyKerman will be attacked by ninja sharks.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Willy was peacefully swimming on Kerbin. But Jinky Kerman the mad scientist was testing his genetically enchanced ninja sharks, and he saw Willy nearby and decided to test the ninja sharks' fighting skills on him. No further information required.

Knkhkjhvkhjv Kerman- Vallhenge

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Knkhkjhvkhjv Kerman was a kerbonaut exploring vallhenge to infestigate what or who created vallhenge. he/she climb up a stone of the vallhenge and he/she fell. the stone fall and hit him/her. Knkhkjhvkhjv Kerman found dead after the next expedition team found him/her

 

u fool kerman: bullied

Link to comment
Share on other sites

One of the scientist in the VAB was really dumb and everyone always said, "You fool, you added the boosters upside down!" or "You fool, the capsule goes above the engines not beneath!"

Unfortunately u fool Kerman was walking through the VAB and thought they were talking to him. He was shy and died from embarrassment.

 

Doit Kerman - Dies after ejecting himself from an airplane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Doit Kerman was doing stunts with his brand new K-100 fighter plane, and one of the stunts involved him intentionally crashing the plane and ejecting himself a split second before hitting ground. But, he had forgot the parachute. You can probably guess what happened.

 

Enbo Kerman will die because he spammed space (or whatever staging button)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Deirick Kerman landed on tylo with the other members of the Tylo Launch Group 2. Babs Kerman made a unfunny joke on the journey:''We need to TrY to touch down LOq''. Then the crew went into a cave system near the landing location. Uz kerman though remembered that they forgot the sience equipment and so everyone except Deirick went back to the lander to take the sience stuff. So Deirick was there, alone, with no other kerbal in sight. But then he heard a roumble because whatever vacuum transmits sound now. A automated Lander lands ontop of the caves, because the Avionics where still from the old mun missions. the lander flies to fast and crashes through the floor, into the cave and besides Deirick. He thinks he is save, but then the cave collapses :(

rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsaufgabenübertragungsgesetz kerman

fell into a pond filled with USAF Orions

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

3 hours ago, Kerminator K-100 said:

The Orions all had their engines on and... well it would be better not to describe what happened

Wrfuiojglh Kerman - Mysteriously died on Bop

Wrfuiojglh Kerman was killed by: unnamed darbel resistance dood

 

Silus Kerman: failed recovery attempt

(from now on I will quote the person before me, pls do the same for me)

Edited by Singhnaut
message doubled up
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Singhnaut said:

Silus Kerman: failed recovery attempt

(from now on I will quote the person before me, pls do the same for me)

Silus Kerman was climbing out the ladder on the Eve rescue ship. He fell off and hit the ground to hard.

Billy-Bobrim Kerman- Died on Laythe

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

48 minutes ago, Stormpilot said:

Billy-Bobrim Kerman was walking down Laythe main road, when he was run over by Bill in his repair truck. He died instantly.

Michale Kerman will die of Science.

Michale Kerman was developing an improved version of kraken drive for the corrupt CEO of Kerbodyne when the kraken came for her and her neck stretched out and she got flung into the sun the end.

Idjit Kerman will die from his drunk driving skills

Remember to quote my stuff pls

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 minutes ago, Singhnaut said:

Michale Kerman was developing an improved version of kraken drive for the corrupt CEO of Kerbodyne when the kraken came for her and her neck stretched out and she got flung into the sun the end.

Idjit Kerman will die from his drunk driving skills

Remember to quote my stuff pls

Idjit Kerman was driving a rover on mun. He was on a hangover and he crashed into the Neil Armstrong memorial the end.

Goerson Kerman will be run over by a fuel tank.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Goerson Kerman was swimming in the pool by the admin building when Joe Kerman (another drunk utility vehicle driver) hit the remains of Orange Kerman and the fuel tank flew and crushed Goerson the end

Moron Kerman will die from welding incident

 

3 minutes ago, Stormpilot said:

Idjit Kerman was driving a rover on mun. He was on a hangover and he crashed into the Neil Armstrong memorial the end.

Goerson Kerman will be run over by a fuel tank.

Sorry I forgot to quote

 

Edited by Singhnaut
Spelled goerson wrong
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, JB182 said:

Moron kerman was in the VAB building a rocket. when he welds, he dies because he touched the hot surface

Jean Kerman: Mun Expedition

Jean Kerman was on an expedition to the moon when the Darbels got really fed up with the Kerbal's shenanigans and threw Bop right at her. She died instantly.

Hllothr Kerman died from Execution from two Mastodon Engines

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...