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Many significant life changes are in the works -
and an explanation as to why the thread of the month for October is so lateAs you may have noticed, the thread of the month for this month is exceptionally late. The trend for the delay of the tread of the month for the last few months has not been because of the forum, the lack of nominations, or the actions of the moderation team. They rest solely on me. A few of you who have befriended me on Discord or have my email address have reached out to me, wondering why I have not been on the forum as much. No, I am still here, and often, I am lurking on the forum and even approving newbies' posts. But some things have been happening in my personal life that have been affecting how much time I spend on the forum, including the time I devote to doing things like the TOTM.
The changes in my profession:
This will be my last semester teaching graduate classes at the local university. The decision was difficult but was made easy by the actions of the new Graduate Studies chair hired at the beginning of the term. Having taught graduate classes for the past fifteen years (American foreign policy), I have always been politically neutral in assignments, lectures, and discussions. I never teach students what to think but how to analyze issues, treaties, and related facts and develop their own opinions based on the facts. I also challenge the students to defend their analysis based on their chosen points - this is the only way to analyze foreign policy properly while allowing students to develop their skills and respect their political views.
My political ideology never enters how I grade or present materials. However, on the first of this semester, the new chair of the graduate studies department informed me that I needed to be more proactive in teaching the "correct" way and told me I needed to "teach the students how to think... (I cannot finish her statement because it violates the forum's no-politics guideline 2.2b). This is a line I cannot cross. So, after that meeting, I went home, did some thinking, did more thinking, and knew what I had to do. So, after careful consideration, I typed up my letter of resignation last Wednesday. After teaching at this university for fifteen years as the only professor offering foreign policy courses, this part of my life will end on December 15th, 2023. I will not teach any ideology nor be a part of forcing an ideology upon any student.
I am still teaching at the community college and will be preparing for the immediate future - the spring and summer 2024 semesters. A few more things need to fall into place before I can retire from the community college. I've taught here since 2009, and I love teaching. The changes in the community college environment have made the job more challenging, mainly when the courses I teach are world civilization (both ancient and modern) and U.S. history (both to 1870 and after 1870). At the community college, I teach with the same educational philosophy I do with my graduate courses - I do not teach anything but the facts, and I teach students how to use the facts and critical thinking skills to analyze the facts and come up with their conclusions based on the facts. I do not teach them what to think; I teach them how to think.
The problem I am having at the community college is changing student attitudes towards learning. There's been a considerable shift in the past ten years, and I am not sure it is for the better. When I first began teaching at a university, many students had a hunger to learn and were excited to be in classes, even a history class. Now, most of the students in my history class do not desire to be there. About half the course does not attend the lectures. Some do not complete work and will still demand a "B" for attending the classes.
And some health changes:
There are some other things I have been facing for a while now, and it's time to share those, too. While many on the moderation team have known it for the past year, I have not shared it with the forum community. Back in 2022, I was diagnosed with the early stages of liver failure and will, at some time, need a liver transplant. At first, they thought I would need the transplant this year and told me that the longer the transplant could be delayed, the better it would be for me in the long run. The human body operates better with original equipment, and I was told that my migraines would probably worsen after a transplant. With that in mind, I asked the medical team the best way to delay the transplant - and I was told to lose weight, change to a primarily Mediterranean and low-carb diet, and get rid of sodas. And that's what I've done.
It does not mean I am out of the woods yet, but I have lost 25 pounds in 6 months and have delayed the need for a transplant by current estimates by a couple of years. My liver seems to have stabilized some. I do not know if losing weight will help, but I intend to find out. I have also had a change in migraine medications since a few of those used to manage the migraine pain and symptoms were known to cause liver failure. So now, I am in more migraine pain, but at least my liver is no longer in the severe crisis it was in.
The mental toll of both my health and the work situations:
When we are young, we feel invincible. As we get older, we realize we are destructible. Life, indeed, is funny. Because of the chronic hemipelagic migraines, I suffer from depression and anxiety—the diagnosis of liver failure and the genuine possibility of a liver transplant added to it. The situations at the community college and the university certainly did not help my mental health. So, not only did I let things slide at home but everywhere, too. This includes my forum activities. For those of you who do not struggle with depression, there are no words I can use to explain the struggle of simply getting the motivation to get out of bed in the morning. There are days I do only the bare minimum that life (and the jobs) requires. Certainly nothing more.
Moving forward:
Knowing changes are coming is helping, but I want to apologize for neglecting my duties on the forum, especially the neverending delays in posting the TOTM. At this point, I have added a calendar reminder to Outlook (yes, those do work, and I should have done it sooner ). I want to continue to do them. But I also realize that for many of you, the TOTM was something you enjoyed. I will respect the desires of the community, too. If the community feels that another member of the moderation team should do the TOTM, I will step aside and let it happen. The choice belongs to you.
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I know I'm slow to respond to this, but I have been away from most of the forum for a very long time now, which, in light of the time I spent as a moderator, was a big change!
I can empathise with your anxiety regarding your potential liver transplant: my liver is under stress as the result of 60 years of cystic fibrosis, and 30 years ago the cardiologists were gearing up towards giving me a heart transplant as the result of a serious cardiomyopathy; the word "transplant" settled deep in my guts and never quite went away, even though intensive medication allowed my heart to recover to a degree that has quite surprised everybody! I had dreams that were very disturbing at the time, but seem comical now, thankfully. And, as you might expect, I suffered depression (to the extent I was on meds for it for over a decade) and can easily empathise with yours.
I wish you well in the changes to your life, and I have to admire you for your courage in standing up to the new administration. I hope you will weather this storm and find positive challenges that enable you to feel productive and fulfilled.
Best wishes,
Richard.
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