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Thread to discuss negative things in a very general way, just see where it goes y'know?


DAL59

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7 hours ago, Superfluous J said:

The last time a deadline actually meant anything in my life was when I was in school. In the "real world," deadlines blow past all the time. EVERY DAY in my job someone or other misses a deadline. You know what happens? Invariably? Every single time for literally decades?

It all depends on the career path. Before I entered the world of academia, I worked in several not-for-profit organizations/non-government organizations, and yeah, deadlines were one of two things - very flexible to the point they really didn't matter or so rigid they were like brick walls.

6 hours ago, TheSaint said:

I swear to God, I was the only person in that entire organization that took deadlines seriously. With the possible exception of Accounts Payable.

Ha, yeah, and in the case of teaching faculty, add the registrar, the students with disabilities coordinator, the student (I turned it in an hour ago; what do you mean it isn't graded yet!?), and the chair of any assigned committee you belong to. I deal with deadlines all the time. Because of my severe depression, the anxiety, and the friend they invited along for the ride, I do manage to meet all the demands (except for the one-hour photo demand by the student), but I put in sixty-hour to seventy-hour weeks to do so. It was one of two minor reasons I resigned from the university where I taught graduate courses, and my obligation to that institution will end on December 8th, when I post my final sets of grades. I will still have the responsibilities to the community college for a bit longer, but this is subject to change.TM

51 minutes ago, SunlitZelkova said:

Hikikomori are people in Japan ranging from millennials to gen Z kids who just can't handle the rigors of Japanese society, shut down, and live in their rooms at their parents' house indefinitely, having no job, simply doing their hobbies and sleeping. Less severe hikikomori, who don't have a job or attend school but don't stay shut in their rooms, are called NEETs (Not-in-Employment, Education, or Training).

I have heard of these people from one of my Japanese graduate students a few semesters back. She also said they are viewed as a disgrace by what she called "proper Japanese." But what you said here:

56 minutes ago, SunlitZelkova said:

Some can find a balance and continue life

This balance is vital to happiness. There's nothing wrong with a life of hard work and strict education, but there also has to be enjoyment. I know that at the community college, there is a tendency to pile work on the older and more experienced faculty because we have experience and time management skills and can get the work done within the specified time frame. The problem is that the workload becomes unequally distributed within the organization, and you get a handful of people doing most of the work. Most organizations will rationalize this because the younger employees lack either experience or fear they are expected to do too much, and if pressured, they will quit.

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2 hours ago, SunlitZelkova said:

Hikikomori are people in Japan ranging from millennials to gen Z kids who just can't handle the rigors of Japanese society, shut down, and live in their rooms at their parents' house indefinitely, having no job, simply doing their hobbies and sleeping. Less severe hikikomori, who don't have a job or attend school but don't stay shut in their rooms, are called NEETs (Not-in-Employment, Education, or Training).

I think what is becoming the commonly-accepted term for that in North America is Dustin, which is another private nickname for the resident dumbS.

Edited by StrandedonEarth
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21 hours ago, adsii1970 said:

No. I do not. And I hope not. Because even you state:

and

Here's why I said" No" and "I hope not." I know it sounds mean, but here it goes:

I have taught at the university and community college level for twenty years. For some reason, the last two years have seen a rise in students who seem to have "time blindness" and a belief that either due dates do not matter or they alone should be exempt from rules that apply to everyone else. Time blindness, as it is now being called, is a belief that it is an actual disability that needs some adaptation or accommodation for a person incapable of managing their time. The claim is this is a disability, much like that of ADHD, depression, anxiety, or related mental disorders. Of course, there is no proof. It is certainly not listed in DSMV V as such. Still, it does not stop some people from using it as a mental disorder (falsely claimed because it uses buzzwords) and, this way, needing accommodation (extra time on an assignment simply because the due date has already passed). I only know this because I had to deal with this just a month ago.

The student I was dealing with demanded I give her two weeks for the assignment she "forgot about because of her time blindness disability." When I asked her for documentation of her "disability," I was accused of all kinds of things (the typical run of things nowadays - anything that sticks to the wall to cause me to give in out of fear of being reported to the administration) and then told that I wanted her to fail. I explained to her it was a matter of ethics - how could I let her have two extra weeks on an assignment she forgot about when her peers did not receive two additional weeks? She answered: "Because I have time blindness, you're not taking me seriously. I lose track of time." The due date for the assignment was in the course syllabus, on the online course calendar, and by the course automated reminders two weeks, then a week before the assignment was due. She had the same reminders as the rest of the class.

The student has the same issue in her other classes, too. She's already on academic probation from the Spring 2023 semester, and this semester, she did worse. She tried the same excuse with me, time blindness, with two other professors. One gave in to her demands only to have the student ask for another extension into finals week. The other professor took the same stand I did: no additional time. One of the things students are supposed to learn from both home and primary and secondary school is time management strategies. Both her parents and her earlier education have failed to achieve this goal.

Procrastination is a real problem, and I understand it gets the better of everyone who has it as a problem. It's happened to me, too. But part of the learning process is getting smacked with the results of procrastination. Often, when we get the fruits of procrastination - and usually, it is terrible fruit - we learn not to allow it to happen again. 

If the university/community college goal is to prepare a student for life and career, then one of the things we must do as professors must now include time management. I'm sorry. And when you realize - and admit - it was not your best work, that's admitting something that even your professor will know. Your professors are more than just grade ATMs; we also try to guide you to where your best efforts become second nature. :)

i had "childhood disabilities" myself. k-12 schools just love to hand those out to pretty much any child that is difficult, usually as a means to get them out of their class. teachers aren't supposed to be making diagnosis, but it usually gets bucked up the chain until someone with a phd in psychology can rubberstamp it, and ship 'em off to special ed. which is precisely what happened with me. informing children that they are not right is a good way to ignite the entitlement firecracker. and this was over 20 years ago, now its much worse. my mom had really abusive parents, they would call her stupid and things like that, to this day she is convinced she is stupid. ive seen her iq test results, she scores well above average. when things dont go her way, shes "stupid", and someone else (usually me) has to come in and fix the problem. these childhood labels do not go away, ever, i dont care who's handing them out, you just undermine them before they get started. maybe the teachers shouldn't have snoozed through the part on self fulfilling prophecy when they were in school.

i did go to college and got my degree, and i had my own issues getting assignments done. my political science report was complete trash and i barely scraped by in that one. and i really crapped out in one of my linux classes because i was too busy partying. i think i got a d and b in those, respectively, i was ahead of the curve in a lot of other stuff. but im still completely non functional in society.  now im an unpaid caregiver for my mom, a burden on society at large, and my retirement plan involves a bullet. i generally think you did the right thing, at some point all the pandering to personality flaws needs to stop. its a shame it didn't happen earlier, this time blindness bs is going to be over that girl's shoulder forever whether its a real phenomena or not.

Edited by Nuke
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21 hours ago, adsii1970 said:

No. I do not. And I hope not. Because even you state:

and

Here's why I said" No" and "I hope not." I know it sounds mean, but here it goes:

I have taught at the university and community college level for twenty years. For some reason, the last two years have seen a rise in students who seem to have "time blindness" and a belief that either due dates do not matter or they alone should be exempt from rules that apply to everyone else. Time blindness, as it is now being called, is a belief that it is an actual disability that needs some adaptation or accommodation for a person incapable of managing their time. The claim is this is a disability, much like that of ADHD, depression, anxiety, or related mental disorders. Of course, there is no proof. It is certainly not listed in DSMV V as such. Still, it does not stop some people from using it as a mental disorder (falsely claimed because it uses buzzwords) and, this way, needing accommodation (extra time on an assignment simply because the due date has already passed). I only know this because I had to deal with this just a month ago.

The student I was dealing with demanded I give her two weeks for the assignment she "forgot about because of her time blindness disability." When I asked her for documentation of her "disability," I was accused of all kinds of things (the typical run of things nowadays - anything that sticks to the wall to cause me to give in out of fear of being reported to the administration) and then told that I wanted her to fail. I explained to her it was a matter of ethics - how could I let her have two extra weeks on an assignment she forgot about when her peers did not receive two additional weeks? She answered: "Because I have time blindness, you're not taking me seriously. I lose track of time." The due date for the assignment was in the course syllabus, on the online course calendar, and by the course automated reminders two weeks, then a week before the assignment was due. She had the same reminders as the rest of the class.

The student has the same issue in her other classes, too. She's already on academic probation from the Spring 2023 semester, and this semester, she did worse. She tried the same excuse with me, time blindness, with two other professors. One gave in to her demands only to have the student ask for another extension into finals week. The other professor took the same stand I did: no additional time. One of the things students are supposed to learn from both home and primary and secondary school is time management strategies. Both her parents and her earlier education have failed to achieve this goal.

Procrastination is a real problem, and I understand it gets the better of everyone who has it as a problem. It's happened to me, too. But part of the learning process is getting smacked with the results of procrastination. Often, when we get the fruits of procrastination - and usually, it is terrible fruit - we learn not to allow it to happen again. 

If the university/community college goal is to prepare a student for life and career, then one of the things we must do as professors must now include time management. I'm sorry. And when you realize - and admit - it was not your best work, that's admitting something that even your professor will know. Your professors are more than just grade ATMs; we also try to guide you to where your best efforts become second nature. :)

Thanks for your academic service Adsii and I hope that this matter gets resolved ASAP :)

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13 minutes ago, Nuke said:

because i was too busy partying.

You just described my first attempt at college. I climbed into a bottle of rum when I began my first attempt in 1988; I had a full orchestra scholarship that would have paid for a B.F.A. and an M.F.A. in Music Composition and Theory. But instead, why do I need to go to English class when I already speak it... you get the idea. At the end of my first two semesters, I had a cumulative G.P.A. of 1.67; the only reason it was that high was all my music classes were As, and the rest were Ds and below.

In fear of death caused by my parents, I did the only thing I thought I could do - I joined the military. It turned out to be a sagacious decision for me. It realigned my life's priorities and gave me a sense of determination, focus, and other tools to keep me from repeating stupidity.

This student's problem is that she grew up during the COVID-era and in an extremely lax middle and high school where she, being a cheerleader and a member of the dance team, has been able to skip out on accountability because she is extremely popular. I guess I am too "old school" because I am about academic performance and could not care less about those things.

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On 12/4/2023 at 8:16 PM, Nuke said:

prego jars are the best fine china there is. the things bounce. get a fancy glass from an expensive store and it will be shrapnel within the week. 

fancy dishes, thats another thing mom does to annoy me. im always worried about dropping her designer brittish bone china when im doing the dishes. she bought this silverware that is freakishly heavy. never should the two meet with any velocity. upon which i serve sloppy joes and chili dogs. she still hasn't  figured out that we po'.

I love getting "vintage" glasses from yard sales. A sink of hot water, a drop of dishwashing liquid, and a capful of bleach care for anything that needs to die within them. Usually, I pay about a quarter ($0.25) per glass. :)

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36 minutes ago, adsii1970 said:

This student's problem is that she grew up during the COVID-era and in an extremely lax middle and high school where she, being a cheerleader and a member of the dance team, has been able to skip out on accountability because she is extremely popular.

It's such a weird combination. Do these position still hold so much clout in the age where everyone's on Zoom?

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11 minutes ago, DDE said:

It's such a weird combination. Do these position still hold so much clout in the age where everyone's on Zoom?

Yes, sadly, they do. Even athletes have a lot of "get out of assignments" cards they can pull from their deck of cards, even at a university when athletics and money come into the equation. However, as is the case with this student, she is no longer a cheerleader this semester nor a member of the dance team (her GPA disqualified her), so now she is a "typical" student while on academic probation. Losing the scholarship should have been a wake-up call, but it was not. I empathize with her because, as I shared, I once did something similar with rum, my once-chosen drink of stupidity. Life can be a cruel teacher when we insist on ignoring the warning signs that the highway of life shows us as we travel down its way.

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1 hour ago, adsii1970 said:

You just described my first attempt at college. I climbed into a bottle of rum when I began my first attempt in 1988; I had a full orchestra scholarship that would have paid for a B.F.A. and an M.F.A. in Music Composition and Theory. But instead, why do I need to go to English class when I already speak it... you get the idea. At the end of my first two semesters, I had a cumulative G.P.A. of 1.67; the only reason it was that high was all my music classes were As, and the rest were Ds and below.

In fear of death caused by my parents, I did the only thing I thought I could do - I joined the military. It turned out to be a sagacious decision for me. It realigned my life's priorities and gave me a sense of determination, focus, and other tools to keep me from repeating stupidity.

This student's problem is that she grew up during the COVID-era and in an extremely lax middle and high school where she, being a cheerleader and a member of the dance team, has been able to skip out on accountability because she is extremely popular. I guess I am too "old school" because I am about academic performance and could not care less about those things.

in my case i had just turned 21 and started partying. i was already starting to burn at the time, with work, school, a family that used me as their personal scapegoat, and not much else. it cost me my paid internship and i almost failed a class for skipping too much. fortunately i recognized the problem early and decided to focus on my studies better. i tried to join the marine corps after college. i knew i had deficiencies coming out of school and failing to find work. i needed some hard discipline and what better than the marines. but all those diagnoses i had from being in spec ed were in my records and i was 4-f.  i ended up in a bunch of minimum wage jobs, one of which was a really toxic workplace, and one was a manual labor job that didnt even pay enough to cover rent, let alone therapy.  even with help ive not been able to correct my deficiencies. if not for the professional entitlement collector i have for mother i would probibly be homeless. i like to think im being useful, but i know im a waste of space.  everyone thinks im disabled, and everyone treats me as such, except of course the disability people. 

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40 minutes ago, Nuke said:

in my case i had just turned 21 and started partying. i was already starting to burn at the time, with work, school, a family that used me as their personal scapegoat, and not much else. it cost me my paid internship and i almost failed a class for skipping too much. fortunately i recognized the problem early and decided to focus on my studies better. 

That's a start. That's better than what I did.

41 minutes ago, Nuke said:

i ended up in a bunch of minimum wage jobs, one of which was a really toxic workplace, and one was a manual labor job that didnt even pay enough to cover rent, let alone therapy.  even with help ive not been able to correct my deficiencies. if not for the professional entitlement collector i have for mother i would probibly be homeless. i like to think im being useful, but i know im a waste of space.  everyone thinks im disabled, and everyone treats me as such, except of course the disability people. 

Have you thought about going out for some of the services designed to help train the unemployed for the workforce? I do not know where you live or the particulars. Still, in our area of the U.S. (Kentucky/Indiana/Illinois), there are all kinds of state-specific programs to help people get training for various jobs; some are in the "work at home" category, too. The key is not to give up hope.

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20 hours ago, SunlitZelkova said:

Time blindness is real but it isn’t a stand-alone disorder, it is an aspect of ADHD or autism. The idea that it is its own disorder seems to have come from… TikTok

uhhh... tiktok and other social medias are instigating bad mental health, which can lead to mental illnesses

anyways heres a song about banning tiktok to lighten the mood

 

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17 minutes ago, adsii1970 said:

That's a start. That's better than what I did.

Have you thought about going out for some of the services designed to help train the unemployed for the workforce? I do not know where you live or the particulars. Still, in our area of the U.S. (Kentucky/Indiana/Illinois), there are all kinds of state-specific programs to help people get training for various jobs; some are in the "work at home" category, too. The key is not to give up hope.

nothing local. little town on a little island in alaska. mom wants to move but we cant afford it in the aftermath of covid. there are jobs here, we got several fish canneries, fishing boats always need greenhorns, and the alaska marine highway is hurting for crew right now. my tech credentials are stale and there really is no tech sector in this state. 

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59,6% of Argentinians vote for lifetime delicensing of doctors who prescibe homeopathic remedies. "Natural" and folk remedies can only be recommended without charging the patient for the appointment.

https://panorama.pub/news/v-argentine-vracej-vypisyvausih-gomeopatiu?vk

Satire, unfortunately.

"In the next referendum, the citizens of Argentina will decide whether predatory microlenders should be declared terrorists and prosecuted with extreme prejudice"

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2 hours ago, DDE said:

59,6% of Argentinians vote for lifetime delicensing of doctors who prescibe homeopathic remedies. "Natural" and folk remedies can only be recommended without charging the patient for the appointment.

https://panorama.pub/news/v-argentine-vracej-vypisyvausih-gomeopatiu?vk

Satire, unfortunately.

"In the next referendum, the citizens of Argentina will decide whether predatory microlenders should be declared terrorists and prosecuted with extreme prejudice"

Well, they can't all be winners I suppose.

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I have been out of school for the entire week sick. I had a fever on Monday, and I've had an extremely itchy throat and constantly stuffed nose, and a headache that simply won't go away. It's even getting in the way of my sleep, as whenever I'm sick I often just stare at the ceiling in the middle of the night confused about my situation. And by the time I'm able to fall asleep, it's 6:30 and my alarm goes off.

Edited by Kerbalsaurus
Man, my PFP really emphasizes my anger at my situation.
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in the world of random inexplicable computer problems. last night after finishing my chores i settled in for a gaming session. it was at this time i noticed a bunch of usb devices were missing from my system, including my ch controllers. i then spent the rest of the day troubleshooting. after screwing around with the software for an hour and reinstalling drivers in the device manager. i got nowhere. when i started pulling plugs i accidently unplugged the keyboard, which is a usb-c device, on accident and then proceeded to plug it into the reset bios button. since i had to reconfigure it anyway i decided to update it as it had some security fixes.

system came back up, controllers still broke. i removed the right plug this time, cleared all the drivers, uninstalled the control center, rebooted. when the machine came to, i had no wifi. so i unplugged the controllers and started troubleshooting the wifi.  its not broke or anything its just not in the device manager. getting at the card is not easy and would require a complete disassembly as its an m.2 e-key hidden under the i/o shroud (i could go into detail about how much i hate these things and other decorative crap, but that would require another post), probibly also requiring a removal of the cpu cooler. with the mods i did to get it to fit, i didn't want to do that, besides im out of thermal paste. 

so then i had to use an old 802.11n dongle from one of my old raspberry pis. i was rapidly approaching the reinstall windows phase of the process, but it was late and i didnt want to do it. figured id do it tomorrow morning, and instead proceeded to back up my files to the nas, which took forever over the aforementioned dongle. then i prepped a reinstall kit for the drivers and software i would need. i went to bed.

get up this morning and my wifi is inexplicably working. an hour of playing musical drivers with a lot of reboots and everything was working again. i hate problems that fix themselves. still dont know what caused it. probibly windows thinking it was better at updating drivers than i am. especially these ch drivers which havent seen an update since 2011.

 

Edited by Nuke
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On 12/6/2023 at 6:17 AM, Nuke said:

i had "childhood disabilities" myself. k-12 schools just love to hand those out to pretty much any child that is difficult, usually as a means to get them out of their class. teachers aren't supposed to be making diagnosis, but it usually gets bucked up the chain until someone with a phd in psychology can rubberstamp it, and ship 'em off to special ed. which is precisely what happened with me. informing children that they are not right is a good way to ignite the entitlement firecracker. and this was over 20 years ago, now its much worse. my mom had really abusive parents, they would call her stupid and things like that, to this day she is convinced she is stupid. ive seen her iq test results, she scores well above average. when things dont go her way, shes "stupid", and someone else (usually me) has to come in and fix the problem. these childhood labels do not go away, ever, i dont care who's handing them out, you just undermine them before they get started. maybe the teachers shouldn't have snoozed through the part on self fulfilling prophecy when they were in school.

i did go to college and got my degree, and i had my own issues getting assignments done. my political science report was complete trash and i barely scraped by in that one. and i really crapped out in one of my linux classes because i was too busy partying. i think i got a d and b in those, respectively, i was ahead of the curve in a lot of other stuff. but im still completely non functional in society.  now im an unpaid caregiver for my mom, a burden on society at large, and my retirement plan involves a bullet. i generally think you did the right thing, at some point all the pandering to personality flaws needs to stop. its a shame it didn't happen earlier, this time blindness bs is going to be over that girl's shoulder forever whether its a real phenomena or not.

I'm very sorry to hear about your mother and your struggles that you are dealing with, but dont retire that way. There's always still time. Try to find a job. Heck, if you live in a state with In N Out in it, go work there! It's got a good pay rate, and you get a free meal. Go to the library and pick up a book, and try to get out of your funk. Learn about how orbital mechanics work. Focus on things that you enjoy. Just do the next right thing.

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2 hours ago, AstroWolfie said:

I'm very sorry to hear about your mother and your struggles that you are dealing with, but dont retire that way. There's always still time. Try to find a job. Heck, if you live in a state with In N Out in it, go work there! It's got a good pay rate, and you get a free meal. Go to the library and pick up a book, and try to get out of your funk. Learn about how orbital mechanics work. Focus on things that you enjoy. Just do the next right thing.

she still needs me for now. retirement comes later. plenty of time for something not depressing to happen. i aint young anymore, i have more skills than i know what to do with, more hobbies than i have time, more projects than i can finish, and an un-diminishing pile of ebooks. i see boredom as a failure of imagination as there is always something that needs to be done, and if not, many other intrests to follow up on.  ultimately im tired, tired of working my buttocks off to solve other people's problems, while society shuns me as some kind of a reject for doing things they themselves are incapable of. 

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38 minutes ago, Nuke said:

she still needs me for now. retirement comes later. plenty of time for something not depressing to happen. i aint young anymore, i have more skills than i know what to do with, more hobbies than i have time, more projects than i can finish, and an un-diminishing pile of ebooks. i see boredom as a failure of imagination as there is always something that needs to be done, and if not, many other intrests to follow up on.  ultimately im tired, tired of working my buttocks off to solve other people's problems, while society shuns me as some kind of a reject for doing things they themselves are incapable of. 

Well I hope you're able to find some rest and relaxation this holiday season :)

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8 minutes ago, AtomicTech said:

Well I hope you're able to find some rest and relaxation this holiday season :)

hard to do when you do the decorating, and the wrapping, and the cooking and have to push mom in her wheelchair to a bunch of free public events in lieu of overwhelming social anxiety. i already threw my back out once this holiday season retrieving 50 pounds of packages from the post office.

Edited by Nuke
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