Make a wish... and have it horribly corrupted!

[0111narwhalz]

Granted, but said hat is actually an endangered brainslug.

I wish I could install and effectvely use Blender on an iPad.

[kerbiloid]

Granted. You use blender on iPad and it grinds it into chippings.

I wish iPad had 8008 CPU with nowadays software requirements.

[TopHeavy11]

Granted, but you now live in @Parkaboy's universe where tablet computers don't exist.

 

I wish that KSP 1.2 would come out already.

[Dafni]

Granted, but you'll get a save-breaking hotfix patch every day, for all eternity.

I wish I could see my Ap/Pe numbers in Staging View.

[Guest]

Granted. The Staging View and Map View now flicker at an extremely fast pace, mixing them both.

I wish for Dres to disappear.

[Delfinus]

Granted, Dres disappears, however all the other planets disappear aswell.

 

I wish for a Cheeseburger.

 

 

[Guest]

Granted. You're now blind and can't taste/smell, so everything you eat will be like a cheeseburger.

I wish for fame.

[TopHeavy11]

Granted. You murdered someone to get it.

 

I wish that @DolphinDude3 would change back his location.

[Delfinus]

Granted.

 

...Wait, I was supposed to corrupt it?

 

I wish I had remembered to corrupt @TopHeavy11's wish.

[insert_name]

3 hours ago, DolphinDude3 said:

Granted.

 

...Wait, I was supposed to corrupt it?

 

I wish I had remembered to corrupt @TopHeavy11's wish.

granted, that is the only thing you remember.

I wish I was less tired

[Guest]

Granted. You're dead, now you won't be tired forever.

I wish for good coins.

[TopHeavy11]

Granted. Their premium milk chocolate. Made 'em myself! You like?

 

I wish for combustible LIMES!

[njmksr]

That plan (literally) blows up in your face.

I wish for a better phone

[0111narwhalz]

Granted, but now you have to carry one of these about in your pocket:

I wish for a racetank. And I want it to go fast.

[KAL 9000]

Ok, but it is a race fish tank and you may drown trying to drive it.

I wish that Jeb would stop blowing up my crafts.

[TopHeavy11]

Granted. He implodes them instead.

 

I wish references.

[Guest]

Wish denied.

I wish for infinite wishes.

[cantab]

Granted, but they're all just more wishes for more infinite wishes, and none do anything useful. Still, you can have some fun inspired by Cantor with them.

I wish for uncountably infinite different wishes.

[rlin]

Granted. You spend an uncountable (aleph 1 to be exact) infinite number of wishes on getting an uncountable amount of wishes per wish, and then you spend those on uncountable wishes per wishes, and you repeat an uncountable infinite times.

 

I wish that the Grand Hotel actually existed.

[cantab]

Granted. Predictably, it collapses into a black hole the size of the Universe.

I wish I could escape a black hole.

[kerbiloid]

Granted. After ten quadrillion years the black hole evaporates and you get free.

I wish black holes were magenta with green stripes.

[Blasty McBlastblast]

Granted! After consuming one of Jeb's special snacks you begin to see all kinds of colours everywhere you look (and even some places you smell and touch), including when you look at black holes. Suddenly you realise why Jeb is always smiling!  

I wish for some fixed axle heavy duty wheels in KSP which would allow me to load my rockets onto trucks and deliver them to grassland launch sites!

[cubinator]

Granted, but they can only turn in deep space.

I wish for a piece of tape that isn't sticky in my pocket, but is sticky everywhere else.

[Jetski]

Granted. Now everything you own is stuck to it. 

 

I wish I was not in this taxi anymore

[Firemetal]

Granted. You are no longer in that taxi but you are in another taxi.

I wish that I had a wish that I could post here.